Will Ferrell, Will Ferrell 4th of July, Will Ferrell SNL, Will Ferrell Saturday Night Live, Will Ferrell Fourth of July, Will Ferrell thong

T.G.I. Five-Days – Week Ending June 30, 2017

· The News You Need to Know Because I Told You So ·

June 30, 2017 28 Comments

Happy Friday, everyone! It’s almost the 4th of July weekend, and we were thisclose to having it be Monday, which would have been awesome, because long weekend and whatnot, but whaddya gonna do. Judging by the traffic, I think a ton of people are taking Monday off (or will be non-productive at work, if they’re expected in), so there’s that!

Shall we put on our patriotic thongs and read on? 

 

1) You thought YOU had a shitty week

A woman in China was trying on jade bracelets in a market when the shopkeeper told her the particular bracelet she had on cost $44,000. She freaked out (like most of us probably would have!) and took it off, but it dropped and broke. She fainted and had to be rushed to the hospital.

The shopkeeper is suing for the cost of the bracelet; the woman says she can only pay $1500. Apparently it’s “only” worth about $26,000.

jade bracelet, jade

THE bracelet. Nothing special if you ask me, but what the heck do I know?! [Image credit: BBC.com.]

I have so many questions about this that I don’t even know where to begin.

  • Why the heck would someone have such a valuable bracelet just out in the open? Never mind breaking it – someone could have stolen it!
  • Perhaps some signage re: the price would have stopped looky-loos from just trying it on?
  • I freely admit that I know less than nothing about jewelry, and jade in particular, but doesn’t this look like a hunk of something that could be glued back together?

 

2) Don’t be “That Guy”

Speaking of people desperately in need – or more accurately, in a rush – for the weekend, New Hampshire state police pulled over a minivan that had everything strapped on the roof… I’m sure the proverbial kitchen sink is under there somewhere.

This feels like a picture that should go in, like, Highlights magazine or something with the caption, “How many things can you find strapped onto the van?”

Can you imagine the interaction between the cop and the jackass driving? This would have made an amazing episode of Cops.

 

3) The One Where They Drank A Ton Of Coffee

I’m a huge fan of the show Friends AND a big data nerd, so I totally geeked out when I read that writer Kit Lovelace did the important work of finding out just how much coffee Monica, Chandler, Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Pheebs drank over ten seasons.

Friends, Friends coffee, Central Perk, Friends coffee consumption, coffee on Friends

Seriously thought Ms. Chanandler Bong would come in first. Huh! [Image credit: Kit Lovelace]

At this time, I have no information on how many sneeze muffins were served, but I will get back to you as soon as I do.

 

4) Best. Name. Ever.

I came across an article this week about a gentleman in Australia who took the microchip out of his transit card and had it surgically implanted it into his hand, so that he could swipe his hand at turnstile scanners, etc.

“My goal is to have frictionless interaction with technology.”

This is interesting and whatnot, but the real story here is the guy’s name:

Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow

I swear I am not making this up.

I love how the article is just casually referring to him as Mr. Meow-Meow, but that is his legal name after all! And I’m an extremely happily married woman, but this totally has me drawing “Mrs. Caitlin Meow-Meow” because it’s just the Best Last Name In The Entire Freaking World.

Mrs. Fiona Charming

If you haven’t seen Shrek 2, this probably makes zero sense. So go see it; it’s hilarious.

 

5) Looks can be deceiving

Remember when you were a kid and all you wanted was to look older? And how as soon as you hit a Certain Age™, that excitement wore off real fast?

There’s an interesting video where bartenders are asked to guess based on looks alone whether someone is of legal age, and it’s really fascinating (and hilarious!) to hear the rationale behind some of their reasoning. Some of them have only been on the job for three weeks, and some have been doing it for thirty years, and it just goes to show that you can’t judge a book by its cover.

There’s a sign at the registers in my local grocery store that reads “We Card Everyone – Consider It A Compliment!”. I like that outlook.

 

 

What are your plans for the holiday weekend? Which “Friend” is your favorite? That bracelet is totally overpriced, right? Let’s discuss in the comments!

 

T.G.I. Five-Yay – Week Ending June 30, 2017 by Blonde Seeking Ambition

28 Comments

  1. Reply

    Cassie

    June 30, 2017

    Always love your weekly catch ups! That man with the transit card implant is insane! I saw so much about it on the news and what a name!

  2. Reply

    Terri Steffes

    June 30, 2017

    I’m a phoebe fan! That bracelet is spot on. I know because we had a jade statue one time and the value was out of this world. Still, out in the open??

  3. Reply

    Karen Morse

    June 30, 2017

    Oh my gosh, I have red about that jade bracelet, I feel so bad for the lady when she fainted! It’s really going to be a valuable lesson for her though. I think number 2 reminds me so much of Mr. Bean! LOL. Can’t believe there’s a guy named “Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow” he sounds pretty cool though.

  4. Reply

    Melissa Chapman

    June 30, 2017

    Cute post I was very amused and it is too bad about the bracelet and the lady who dropped it. Is getting through the turnstiles that important?

  5. Reply

    parentingpatch

    June 30, 2017

    I can totally see Phoebe drinking the most coffee. Maybe all the caffeine explains some of her nuttier behavior lol!

  6. Reply

    Allison Rebecca

    June 30, 2017

    Haha oh my goodness- that bracelet story! What in the world? I would have fainted too!! Sheesh!

  7. Reply

    theclutterboxblog

    July 1, 2017

    OMG I totally agree about the bracelet, that’s terrible the woman’s being sued. OMG I love love the Fiona Charming!!

  8. Reply

    Scott

    July 1, 2017

    True jade is VERY expensive and can’t just be glued back together. However, any shop that carries something that expensive must certainly have insurance to cover accidents.

  9. Reply

    Jessica Joachim

    July 1, 2017

    OMG that bracelet! I can’t blame the woman for fainting when he told her the price! This is why I don’t touch stuff at the store lol

  10. Reply

    adventures

    July 1, 2017

    This made my day. Thanks for sharing!

  11. Reply

    toughcookiemommy

    July 1, 2017

    Wow, I feel really bad for the lady with the jade bracelet. That is exactly why I’m always really careful when checking out items that I haven’t purchased yet.

  12. Reply

    Andrea

    July 1, 2017

    DUDE i just about laughed at seeing the friends info about coffee, who would of known that is so awesome.
    I wouldn’t have thought that they did that research.

  13. Reply

    Joanna @ Everyday Made Fresh

    July 1, 2017

    Love Rachel! That bracelet price is crazy ridiculous! It should be locked up in a glass case. That name is still making me laugh…Hysterical!

  14. Reply

    Marlynn | UrbanBlissLife

    July 1, 2017

    Oh my gosh, that bracelet story is crazy! And I agree: it does look like something that could (and should) just be glued back together. Love the Friends coffee chart too!

  15. Reply

    mommywifelifestyle

    July 1, 2017

    What in the world? Who would have such a fragile bracelet out for anyone to try on. That also is a ton of coffee to consume I wonder if Mr. Meow Meow likes milk in his.

  16. Reply

    Louise x (@withlovefromlou)

    July 2, 2017

    I’m sorry, but that bracelet is hideous! LOL. Who would pay $44,000 for it?! I’m also a massive Friends fan, so found the coffee graph really interesting 🙂

    Louise x

  17. Reply

    Angela Bethea

    July 2, 2017

    That bracelet incident is so sad. I can’t imagine being in her shoes. That’s why I’m always very careful whenever I looked around the stores and window shopping.

  18. Reply

    Cassie @ Southeast by Midwest

    July 2, 2017

    I feel so bad for that poor woman! I could totally see it happening to me. I would have fainted too!

  19. Reply

    Prime Beauty Blog (@PrimeBeauty50)

    July 2, 2017

    Too funny that you started off with the Will Farrell sketch. I was just watching it the other day. I totally agree with you about the bracelet. it doesn’t look like anything special and why would you have such an expensive piece just laying around. My favorite friends character is Chandler.

  20. Reply

    Holly

    July 2, 2017

    These are some really interesting finds that you have posted here. Really for the coffee that isn’t very much. Id say over ten years my number would be closer to 1,000

  21. Reply

    Misty Nelson

    July 2, 2017

    The bracelet conundrum, what a mess! I felt bad for her too, talk about price tag shock! Friends is always a flashback to highschool for me.

  22. Reply

    Rhian Westbury

    July 3, 2017

    I’d have freaked if I knew how much a bracelet was I was trying on x

  23. Reply

    Roxanne

    July 3, 2017

    I think I would have fainted too if I broke something worth that much! I can barely handle going down the glass aisle at the dollar store with two grabby kids, let alone a pricey jewelry shop. Oh man… this was an entertaining read!

  24. Reply

    Kristin

    July 3, 2017

    Oh my goodness that jade bracelet thing made me shudder. Can you even imagine how scary that must have been for her?!

  25. Reply

    Brittany Muddamalle

    July 3, 2017

    Okay I just saw the post about the stuff on the guys car. Who would seriously drive like that! It’s so scary! Even just a few things on there is crazy! Ha

  26. Reply

    bitsandbiteswithava

    July 3, 2017

    No plans here for holiday. We had it over this weekend for Canada Day. Kids went in the backyard and watched some fireworks but beyond that we don’t really do much! – jeanine

  27. Reply

    Veronica

    July 3, 2017

    I feel so sorry for that woman who broke that ridiculously expensive bracelet! I hope she will work it out!

  28. Reply

    Shannon Gurnee

    July 6, 2017

    Ok that bracelet is absolutely crazy! I think I would have been especially careful after he said it costs $44,000. And the guy with the luggage on his roof – oh my gosh – I totally would have taken a picture and shard on social media – ha ha!

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