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T.G.I. Five-Days – Week Ending July 7, 2017

· The News You Need to Know Because I Told You So ·

July 7, 2017 36 Comments

Can you believe that the year is officially half-over?! It was literally just last week when I stopped double-checking that I’m writing the correct year on my checks. (Yes, I still write a few checks every now and again… and then I send them via carrier pigeon. I’m old school like that.) 

My mother told me the other day that her grandfather once said, “Well, it’s the 4th of July… that’s it – summer’s over!” He was a rose grower, so he was already moving on to planting fall flowers. And if you’ve been in a store lately – Target, I’m looking at you – summer is apparently old news, and back to school is where it’s at.

Until then, however… tide yourself over with some of these tidbits!

 

1) Melts in your… nose?

Like many people in the world, I love chocolate. Here are some of the wonderful, amazing, delicious forms of chocolate I adore:

  • Brownies
  • Chocolate ice cream
  • Hot cocoa
  • Fudge
  • Cadbury Dairy Milk Roast Almond Bar (this is the best chocolate bar ever made)
  • Chocolate almond milk
  • Chocolate-covered pretzels
  • Etc., etc.

You see where I’m going with this.

Never ONCE in my life have I said:

“Man, I really wish I could snort some chocolate up my nose. Now THAT would really be awesome.”

You know what they say – don’t ask and ye shall receive. My unvocalized, unwanted prayer has come true. The crack team of scientists over at Legal Lean (nice little nod to “lean”, a.k.a. “sizzurp” / “purple drank” / whatever the rappers are calling it these days) have brought us Coco Loko – snortable chocolate. That’s right – chocolate you’re supposed to snort.

What a time to be alive.

Coco Loko (remember Four Loko? Is that still legal?) is also laced with a whole bunch of crap that’s found in energy drinks.

Dr. Andrew Lane, director of the Johns Hopkins Sinus Center, threw some hilarious low-key shade when asked about the risks of snortable chocolate:

“There’s no data, and as far as I can tell, no one’s studied what happens if you inhale chocolate into your nose. When I mention it to people, nobody’s ever heard of it.”

[Note: Probably because all Dr. Lane’s scientist friends are doing, oh, I don’t know… IMPORTANT SCIENTIFIC WORK.]

“Maybe… I’m not in the in-crowd.”

 

2) Speaking of foods that probably ended up getting snorted…

Well, the 4th of July was earlier this week, and that means the world’s competitive eaters battled for the Mustard Belt (I’m serious) at the annual Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest. You may think that your crazy Uncle Frank won a record for the most hot dogs eaten at your barbecue, but he’s got nothing on Joey Chestnut, who won his 10th men’s title this year.

Mr. Chestnut ate 72 hot dogs (including buns!) in 10 minutes. While you’re digesting that fact, consider this: that’s 20,160 calories. IN TEN MINUTES. He also told reporters that he gained 23 pounds during the competition. Feel better about everything you ate over the holiday?

(Don’t feel too badly for him, though – he went on to say that it only takes him about 4-5 days to return to his normal weight. But I’m sure it’s a very uncomfortable couple of days!)

Miki Sudo, the women’s champion for the 4th year in a row, ate 41 hot dogs and buns, and looked way happier than I would about it the following day on the set of the Today Show:

On the set of the Today Show! 41 hot dogs and buns in 10 min:)

A post shared by Miki Sudo (@omgitsmiki) on

 

 

3) Putting the “ass” in class action

Remember the super-cheesy commercials for 1-900 phone sex lines that would come on late at night back in the day? (You can pretend like you have no idea what I’m talking about… this is a judgement-free zone.) Anyhow, I thought 1-900 lines went the way of the VCR and the cassette tape, but apparently, they’re still a thing.

How, you’re probably asking, do I know this? It’s because Anne Cannon, a phone sex worker for Tele Pay USA, filed a federal class action lawsuit claiming she (and possibly up to a thousand others) were cheated out of wages.

Anne lives in Florida, where the minimum wage is $8.10 per hour. She alleges she is required to work more than 40 hours a week, with no paid overtime, and no way to accurately call length. (As someone who managed call centers for years, this drives me INSANE.) Her average talk time is about six minutes per call, and she is paid about 10 cents per minute (or $6 per hour). If her average talk time falls below six minutes, her pay drops to 7 cents per minute ($4.20 per hour).

Fun fact: Tele Pay USA charges $5 per minute – $300 an hour.

No matter what your opinion is on phone sex, what the company is doing is incredibly shitty. The class action plaintiffs want three years’ worth of unpaid back pay and overtime.

 

 

4) Filed under: EWWWWWW

Maine is known as “Vacationland”, and 74-year-old Charles Manning might be getting a state-sponsored vacation in jail for dumping a cup of live bedbugs * full body shudderon the counter of a city office.

bed bugs

This poor guy does NOT get paid enough to deal with this shit. [Image credit: William Bridgeo]

Mr. Manning visited a different office in Augusta City Center earlier in the day to complain about bedbugs in his residence. He later returned to the General Assistance office, cup o’ bugs in hand, angered that he didn’t qualify for anything as he had other sources of income. He then dumped the bedbugs out on the counter and left. The entire building had to be closed and fumigated.

Bug Boy is being charged with assault and obstruction of government administration, which can get you up to a year in jail and a $2,000 fine.

City Manager William Bridgeo commented that he’s “never had anything as yucky as this” happen before in his entire career.

Me either, Bill. Me either.

 

 

5) One shopping channel to rule them all

QVC announced this week that it planned to merge with home-shopping rival network HSN in a deal worth $2.1 billion. That’s a LOT of money. (Are they going to put it on Easy Pay? Ha! I crack myself up!)

What I find most interesting about the whole deal is that the combined QVC/HSN conglomerate will be the third-largest e-tailer in North America behind Amazon and Walmart. I never realized that they moved that much merchandise! They ship 320 million packages every year – insane.

Because I’m nothing if not sentimental, it seems like the perfect time to take a stroll down memory lane and look at some of the best on-air bloopers from QVC and HSN. Join me, won’t you?

 

 

I could literally post DOZENS of amazing videos. The next time you’ve got some time to kill, curl up with your phone and Google some of these bad boys!

 

 

What’s your preferred way to eat (or snort, I guess…) chocolate? How many hot dogs do you think you could eat in ten minutes? (Hell… I’ll give you an HOUR!)  Ever buy anything from QVC or HSN? Tell me about it in the comments!

 

36 Comments

  1. Reply

    Sarah Bailey

    July 7, 2017

    I love chocolate, I eat way to much of it as it is that good.. But I can never ever imagine snorting it. I mean who comes up with an idea like that?! How strange but also I want to know more about it which is weird.

  2. Reply

    Jessica Taylor

    July 7, 2017

    The Charles Manning post almost made me vomit! That poor man didn’t deserve that whatsoever!

  3. Reply

    parentingpatch

    July 7, 2017

    I am all about the chocolate too! I cannot think of a single treat made with chocolate that I do not like.

  4. Reply

    Alayna

    July 7, 2017

    It is crazy to think we are already half-way through 2017! Also, I agree that chocolate is so good! Nothing can taste bad if there is chocolate involved! Thanks for sharing!

  5. Reply

    Terri Ramsey Beavers

    July 7, 2017

    My prefered way to eat chocolate is icy cold. As in ice cream. I could eat chocolate ice cream all day long if I’d let myself.

  6. Reply

    Joanna @ Everyday Made Fresh

    July 7, 2017

    I have a deep obsessed love for chocolate! Lol. I used to be very addicted to QVC, and ordered a lot..all.the.time. Great stuff. I will admit I hated HSN. They didn’t seem as “real” as the people on QVC were. Anywho. Live bed bugs, ICK!

  7. Reply

    Corinne & Kirsty 🌸 (@corinnekirsty)

    July 7, 2017

    Can’t believe we’re half way through the year either. I am obsessed with chocolate too, ice cream and brownies being my favs! xx corinne

  8. Reply

    theclutterboxblog

    July 7, 2017

    Summer is definitely not over. I need it to last at least another six months. 🙂

    That pay break down for the class action is crazy. Fingers crossed she wins.

    OMG the bedbugs, that is nightmare worthy

  9. Reply

    Karen Morse

    July 7, 2017

    I don’t think I have what it takes to go and snort chocolate they are perfectly fine being eaten. Who could ever beat Joey Chestnut? Lol. I cannot begin to imagine the hassle that man made with his bed bugs. What an a**. I’d be mad to if I wasn’t paid properly, that woman has every right to take action.

  10. Reply

    Cassie @ Southeast by Midwest

    July 7, 2017

    HSN has actually been very big for the beauty industry. They sell a lot of lower tier high-end products with easy pay. A lot of people owe their make up collection to HSN, lol.

  11. Reply

    adawnpaxton

    July 7, 2017

    I love chocolate too! I have never tried that Cadbury Chocolate Bar! I will definitely have to pick one up!

  12. Reply

    Amber

    July 7, 2017

    Ooo well now I want some chocolate. I love it as well. So delicious. I can’t believe the year is half over either.

  13. Reply

    Claudia Krusch

    July 7, 2017

    I was shocked when I heard about Coco Loko. I can not believe someone dumped a cup of bed bugs on the counter. Makes my skin crawl just looking at it.

  14. Reply

    Terri Steffes

    July 7, 2017

    OMG The moon is NOT a planet… I about died listening to this! Lord, this is crazy!

  15. Reply

    Heather Riccobono (@BrieBrieBlooms)

    July 8, 2017

    I seriously love all chocolate. We are currently on a beach vacation in our favorite Southern California beach town. Every year we go Strawberry picking here and over spring break I also brought along gold coins to leave behind from a visit from the leprechaun for my young daughters. We melted the coins and dipped the strawberries we had picked in the chocolate – amazing. We are going home tomorrow and haven’t picked strawberries yet. They don’t know yet but I’m about to bribe them with a chocolate run so we can replay spring break!

  16. Reply

    Journa Ramirez

    July 8, 2017

    Same here! I love anything with chocolates and sometimes I feel guilty.. because I’m eating too much. But it’s soo good! Love your post, btw. 😀

  17. Reply

    Sheryy's

    July 8, 2017

    I love chocolate as well. Its one thing i cant give up or feel guilty about. But i have never heard and will never try snorting it . Who does that?

  18. Reply

    nlampert

    July 8, 2017

    I also still write cheques from time to time! I have some chocolate fudge in my fridge right now that you’ve put me in the mood for!

  19. Reply

    Sondra Barker

    July 8, 2017

    Wow 72 hot dogs in 10 minutes, you would think that would cause a stomach cramp. I would inhale any food that smells amazing so I’m right there with you for the love of chocolate.

  20. Reply

    Scott

    July 9, 2017

    Hand-made chocolate milk shakes are better than all of those. Although a plain milk chocolate bar does come in a close second.

  21. Reply

    Blythe Alpern

    July 9, 2017

    My favorite way to eat chocolate is via Peanut Butter Chocolate Ice Cream. So delicious. I’m not the biggest hot dog eater so I would probably only eat two in 10 minutes. Sad, I know, but 2 is my limit on any day.

  22. Reply

    Prime Beauty Blog (@PrimeBeauty50)

    July 9, 2017

    HSN and QVC merging together could be interesting. I wonder how that will affect on-air talent and brands.

  23. Reply

    Lena B

    July 9, 2017

    OK, those are really cool – great news bits, and OMG – seriously, bedbugs?

  24. Reply

    Nina Bosken

    July 9, 2017

    Chocolate that you’re supposed to snort sounds crazy. It sounds like you had quite the entertaining 4th!

  25. Reply

    Elizabeth O

    July 9, 2017

    Happy 4th to you too! I love hot chocolate on a cold winter night and in the summer too. Yeah, year round works.

  26. Reply

    Debra Hawkins

    July 9, 2017

    Holy gross! That cup of bedbugs gives me the heebie jeebies just looking at it! I think I would have to take several showers if that had been dumped on my counter.

  27. Reply

    Rebecca Brianne

    July 9, 2017

    WOW that’s a big takeover between QVC and HSN. That will be interesting to see how things change! When I had my first solo apartment I went through a phase where I could only fall asleep to QVC on the television haha

    Best,
    Rebecca

  28. Reply

    Blair Villanueva

    July 10, 2017

    Bed bugs are definitely a no no. Totally frustrating when one time I checkin at this hotel, and bedbugs celebrates their siesta with me. I had to visit the hospital for cleanup and vaccine, for security.

  29. Reply

    Rimsha

    July 10, 2017

    I had such a fun time reading this! You’re really funny and there were so many different things you talked about so I didn’t even get bored 😀

  30. Reply

    Shannon Gurnee

    July 10, 2017

    I love chocolate! And the Cadbury Almond Chocolate Bar is sooo good! Bug Boy is gross!!! Yuck! I would not be happy being the employee on the other side of that window!

  31. Reply

    AlaynaFrankenberry

    July 11, 2017

    I’m not gonna lie. There have been times in my life when I would have snorted some chocolate. And those times are all the times, including now. Can someone set up a line?

  32. Reply

    Louise x (@withlovefromlou)

    July 11, 2017

    My fave way to eat chocolate is via my mouth. And I reckon I could eat maybe 2 or 3 hot dogs in 10 minutes. I’m a very boring person! LOL

    Louise x

  33. Reply

    Krystle Cook

    July 12, 2017

    I can not believe that they year is halfway gone. I feel like we were just having cooler weather. And as for chocolate….I swear there is no limit or right way to eat it.

  34. Reply

    Mommy Peachy

    July 13, 2017

    That girl ate 41 hotdogs in 10 minutes??? Oh wow! She is awesome! BTW, I wish I could snort chocolates too!

  35. Reply

    shandaarbuy

    July 17, 2017

    Thanks for sharing nice article..

  36. Reply

    Integrityuc

    September 5, 2017

    Thank you very much for sharing very Informative article…

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