wedding, wedding dance, first dance, wedding song

May I Have This (First) Dance?

June 14, 2016 5 Comments

At every wedding I attend, I can’t help feeling the tiniest twinge of regret over my own nuptials. Not because I wish I had worn a different dress, or picked a different venue, or (God help me!) picked a different PERSON… but because of Our Song.

I’m not talking about “Our Song” (hi there, T. Swizzle!). I’m talking about OUR Song – the one that plays during your First Dance as a married couple, that awesome tradition where everyone stands around and stares at you for 3-5 minutes.

I went to the loveliest wedding over the weekend (congratulations again, Christina and Carl!) – everything about it was so unique and just so * them * that I’m still beaming a few days later. During their first dance – to a gorgeous song that I couldn’t quite place – I overheard my husband and a friend whispering: “Is this the Flaming Lips?” (They think it is. Christina and/or Carl: Please confirm!)

I thought to myself: This could actually be THEIR song. Like, the song that makes them think deep thoughts about their relationship, and that is so awesome. I love these two people.

And then that familiar twinge of regret crept back because, well… I’ve been living a lie. The Song that my husband and I danced to at our wedding all those years ago – it wasn’t Our Song. I chose “Stand By Me” by Ben E. King, because it’s a wonderful song, I love the sentiment, and it fit the requirements of being just a hair under three minutes, which is as long as I can tolerate people looking at me before I burst into flames. But our “real” song? The Official Theme Song™ of our relationship?

Take Me Home Tonight” by Eddie Money.

This is our JAM. The lyrics are fucking amazing:

  • “I feel a hunger – it’s a hunger.” Mind = BLOWN
  • “Let’s find the key and turn this engine on!”  YAAASSS
  • “Be my little baby – oh oh oh oh ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” Just like Ronnie said!

Mr. Seeking Ambition and I do a rather amazing duet of this song, thankyouverymuch, and it’s probably pretty likely that we wouldn’t have been able to make it through a dance to this song without cracking up and doing some sweet air sax. Our musical tastes are wildly different, but we’ve been able to compromise over a mutual love of bitchin’ 80’s tunes.

So why didn’t I just go with our favorite song? The truth is, I just couldn’t face the prospect of explaining that we are not sex fiends to my newly minted relatives, particularly my husband’s sweet little Gram.

grandma, wedding, grandmother, grandmother at wedding

Would YOU want to explain that to this sweet face?

Tell me, people… what’s YOUR Song? If it’s anything in the Eddie Money oeuvre… we both should run out and buy lottery tickets, because that’s just plain spooky.


  1. Reply


    June 14, 2016

    Ahhh, I would have paid money to see you guys dance to Take Me Home Tonight!!!! There’s gotta be a beautiful acoustic version of it somewhere!!! I love that song! My favorite verse is ‘I get frightened in all this darkness, I get nightmares I hate to sleep alone. I need some company, a guardian angel to keep me warm when the cold winds blow!” If that is not wedding song material, I don’t know what it is.

    Our song was Simple Song by the Shins 🙂 It is the one song that can pull us out of any funk we are in. Also James Mercer from The Shins has said, “I wrote it on the living room floor of my apartment when my wife and I were newlyweds. This was when we were just starting our little domestic life together, about to have our first daughter. So it was kind of this song about my wife, our relationship and this whole new life we have ahead of us.” And also, ““Simple Song’ is the love song. I mean, it’s that feeling that I’ve gained a lot of confidence, and a lot of it is because of my wife and the strength that she gives me. That strength that you get from a real strong love.”

    It couldn’t be more appropriate – but we probably still would have used it, even if it wasn’t, haha!!

    Now you and the Mr. have to do a vow renewal and use Take Me Home Tonight 🙂

    So glad you guys had fun- We love you too!!!!!!!
    xx Christina

    • Reply


      June 14, 2016

      AHHHH!!! I *LOVE* the song – it’s absolutely perfect… and the story behind it makes it even better 🙂 I’m going to have to download it for sure!

      And I’m so happy to know that I’m not the only Eddie Money lover! Steve’s cousin Liz got married last year and played it during her reception for us because she’s awesome 🙂

      Have an AMAZING honeymoon! xoxoxo

  2. Reply

    Stephanie Says.......Stephanie

    June 14, 2016

    Caitlin, we didn’t even dance as my dad had just past away a few months before and his favorite part of ANY wedding was the dance. I just couldn’t face it without him. However, if we’d had a “first” dance it would have been to “Someone Like You”. We both love Van “the man” Morrison.

    • Reply


      June 14, 2016

      Van truly is The Man! That’s a great song. And I’m right there with you regarding having a tough time with missing a parent during a wedding. My dad passed away when I was ten, and it was only just recently (maybe the last three weddings that I’ve been to?) that I’ve been able to actually be in the room during the father-daughter dance.

  3. Reply

    Joe Della Morte

    June 17, 2016

    For the record, Joselle’s and my song is also an Eddie Money tune: not that I would have ever danced a first dance to it but “Two Tickets to Paradise” always felt correct for us.

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