5 foods that sound better in French

December 30, 2012 0 Comments

I am a recovering Picky Eater (that is, I now at least take a bite of something before declaring it as vile). One of my biggest fears is passing this charming little trait on to my yet-to-be-conceived children. My poor parents tried just about everything to con me into eating something other than cereal as a kid… except for tapping into my love of all things French. EVERYTHING sounds better en français!

A new year is just around the corner. This Blonde Seeking Ambition is always looking to broaden her horizons. Therefore, I have decided to combine my love of la langue française and my love of making lists into a stab at personal development. I vow to try the following foods again in 2013 – but only if I mumble their names in French while blindfolded and holding my nose.

1) GRAPEFRUIT. I hate them. They are bitter and yucky and gross. They sully the very names of two of the things I love most (grapes, and fruit in general). However, I am totally intrigued by le pamplemousse.

2) SQUID. Truth be told, I don’t think I’ve ever actually eaten squid. They look disgusting. And they produce INK. I’m pretty sure humans aren’t supposed to ingest that. But what about… le calamar? It sounds like something sexy people whisper huskily to each other over glasses of expensive wine. (If you picture the equivalent in English – not so much of an aphrodisiac.)

3) TRIFLE. Okay, this one isn’t really vomit-inducing – I just don’t really care for them. I have had several trifles made by very talented bakers, and I have yet to find one that leaves me feeling more than meh at best. However, I am totally willing to request un diplomate for my next birthday. Fancy people eat les diplomates. Sexy, squid-eating people eat les diplomates.

4) ZUCCHINI. I have been known to pronounce this food in form that rhymes with “yuck-eeny”. But la courgette – that almost sounds like Corvette! And Corvettes are the preferred vehicle of sexy, squid-eating people.

5) LICORICE. My visceral hatred of black licorice is perhaps the   most intense item on this list. Even the federal government is warning you to stay away from this crap. (Side note: My beloved mother ADORES black licorice and has even been known to enjoy black licorice flavored Necco wafers. Clearly, I must have been switched at birth.) But… la réglisse… that’s a whole other story. That shit sounds downright regal. The candy of kings and queens, as it were.

What’s the grossest food on this list? Do you have a friend or family member felled by black licorice? Discuss.

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